Sunday, 21 October, 2007

its been months...


Its been months since i last talked to you, yet here i am hearing your voice in my ears every time i am alone

its been months since i decided to get over you, yet here i am sitting alone in my hostel room at 2 am in the morning...crying over you

its been months since i decided to delete you from my life, and here i am for the zillionth time reading your orkut profile

its been months since i decided to move on, yet here i am reminiscing about the games we played...the dreams i dreamed with you

its been months since i decided to let you go, yet here i am writing another post about you in my blog

its been months since i decided to forget you, yet here i am making new reminders of your stay in my life

its been months since i decided to never contact you again, yet here i am saving a mail to you in my drafts

its been months since i decided i didn't love you, yet here i am looking at google image search results on "love"...and thinking of you

its been months since i convinced myself i did the right thing by ending what we had, yet here i am hating myself for that last mail i sent your way...

its been months since i decided i don't care about you anymore, and here i am asking the most unlikely of people..is he ok..??

42 comments:

Gonecase said...

Why is it that most of us react the same way, act the same way.Its east to say move on, but not easy to move on

umangexuberance said...

@gonecase...well that about sums it up :)

Sameera said...

Lovely rendition.
I don't know if I should say this,but is there no chance of a reconciliation?
Cheer up dear,God Bless...

indicaspecies said...

Touched a sentimental chord within me ..

There occur same incidents in your life that leaves you feeling you are never going to be the same again!

A poignant posting. Well done.

humbl devil said...

if you were the instigator(for the break up, that is), then try to reconcile...but, only if he's interested...
if his actions were the instigator, then it's time to shed that emotional baggage and move on...use your blog as a vent...it helps...

humbl devil said...

and oh yeah...
cheer up girl...
love in life is overstated...

Priya said...

:)Poignant

umangexuberance said...

@sameera
no baby he didn't leave me that choice

umangexuberance said...

@indicaspecies
thank you

umangexuberance said...

@humble devil
well that' exactly what i am trying to do here :)

and

yes love in life is overstated, but if you have had it in your life once..its hard to live without it..

umangexuberance said...

@priya
thank you
it was a little too honest..had half a mind to delete it..but then just decided to leave it here as a reminder of what i need to forget..

FireWhisky said...

vry beautifully written... i feel it too sometimes... bt it isnt fair tat i shd b unhappy n depressed abt somethin tat wsnt gud 4 me...

cheer up... its only made u stronger... luv n hugs...

umangexuberance said...

@firewhisky
yes that is the way i like to look upon it
but then i think of how beauiful it had been while it lasted and what kills is i never knew what went wrong..
but yes i am trying to move on
thnx
*hugs back* :)

maverick said...

well...a post true to human nature...makes us think but then..this is wat v are and this is how we react..so as far as i ve learned in life..live on....

umangexuberance said...

@maverick
aah yes
this is an honestly human side of me
true honest i m afraid
but then that's what this blog is all about..being honest to myself

live on

well, that's what i am trying to do..its just that some moments come when we just don't know how to move forward without spending time with our past..the night i wrote this post was such a moment..

maverick said...

well..everyone has those moments..even i do...probably thats y i started blogging too..but i believe its a nice way to get ur feelings out....n the other mode i prefer is going out for a drive...really relaxes me...lol..well carry on bloggin.. :)

A said...

Awwwww this is so very mine post. This is wot love does to you. You try to move on n it drags u back.

Vent ur feelings out..............
Blogrollin ya :)

umangexuberance said...

@maverick
lolz
well, thats exactly the reason i am into it..nothing relaxes me and helps me hel the way blogging does :)

umangexuberance said...

@a
alas, this is what love does to us when things don't work out :(
but if they do..then its the most beautiful feeling in the world
and yes blogging helps beyond measure.. :)

maverick said...

hmm..glad if it does relax u..but then...dont let it become the only thing that relaxes u...

umangexuberance said...

@maverick
no it isn't, photographing others, getting myself photographed, spluging on a Jamoca Almond Fudge :yummmm:, immersing in a tub, playing with my six year old cousin and her friends, watching reruns of friends and desperate housewives, watching three of my favourite romantic movies--"dilwale dulhaniya le jaenge", "maine pyar kiya" and soche na tha"..listening to "phla nasha"..etc etc..work equally well :D :D

maverick said...

well...we do ve some stuff in common...i do watch friends reruns...i mean i got all ten seasons at home...miss them here..but then downloading all new movies makes up for it...2nd thing...nirula's icecreams...i miss HCF- Hot chocolate fudge..i mean its simply out of the world...movies.mostly watch all kinds..but then DDLJ is one of mah favorites too..

umangexuberance said...

@maverick
good to find dat :)
by the way try haldiram's HCF...its heaven in a cup..trust me..my first love..even better than Nirula's HCF :)

maverick said...

hmm...well..wen it comes to HCF...i cant trust anyone other than nirula's..but then will surely give haldirams a try..if u say thats it that good...u too can hog along...lol

umangexuberance said...

@maverick
lolzzz...anything for an HCF
trust me its delicious and this is an addict talking

maverick said...

hmm..well then which haldiram r v talkin abt?gurgaon??

Tabz said...

I think the story is the same evrywhr...heart-wrenching!
Two tears just eluded me...

its easier said than done: Move On..
i dont kno the whole story, but then try to strike a cord again!

and sweets, HUGS, Bear Hugs!

~lassinsane.blogdrive.com

umangexuberance said...

@tabz..i know baby
i know moving on is very important and that is what i am trying to do...but then this was written at one of those moments when i just let go..was real low..u kno
and thank u sooooooo much for ur hugs..u r a real darling :)
*hugs back* muah :)

umangexuberance said...

@maverick
well yes thats the one..the one in sahara mall..have you ever been to it??

maverick said...

so how many HCFs are we talkin abt??i ll ve one...u??

umangexuberance said...

@maverick
well one at a time is just about as much i can manage
i like my heaven in single helpings :D

maverick said...

so u game for an HCF@ haldirams in the middle of jan??

umangexuberance said...

@maverick
now that is something i'll have to think about now :P
by the way what would u be doing in gurgaon in jan?

maverick said...

i would be at home for almost 8 odd days in jan...after the end of this trimester..n my home's delhi...

umangexuberance said...

@maverick
ohk cool
but i might be off to goa in jan for my little vacation :P :P :D

maverick said...

hmmm....well upto u :)

umangexuberance said...

@maverick
:)
so what else do you like apart from HCF?
and i'll read the rest of your posts after diwali 'coz i have my examz at the moment.. :(

maverick said...

hey..howdy..get well soon...well i do like a lot of things..too varied too be listed out here...do well in ur exams..best of luck... :)

umangexuberance said...

@maverick..hmmm..i am better now and thanks :)

maverick said...

hmm???newaz..u ve yahoo/msn/gtalk?

umangexuberance said...

hmmm..is my very own multipurpose word :)

maverick said...

hmmm......okie...anyways....